Damn You All to Hell!

As an avid NBC4 news watcher, I am often informed of free giveaways and specials by newscasts. Weeks ago Doreen Gentzler shared with the public that if you went to Z Burger in Tenleytown and at the register said to the cashier "Shaaazam!" you'd receive a free burger. This information is obviously vital to my survival.

Similarly, I recently learned from a NBC4 broadcast that Dr. Pepper was going to uphold its promise to give a free soda to everyone in America if "Chinese Democracy" was released this year. Weee! Free Dr. P!

Or not.

I was thirsty. I Googled. And sadly, I'm still thirsty.

I found the website to sign up for the coupon (which would be delivered promptly in 4-6 weeks) and this is what showed up on my screen:



Crap. Jibberish. What the fuck?

Bottom line? No free Dr. Pepper...
Sad day, folks. Sad day.